When all of this is over - A day in New York

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Hey, tonight if you think about it
Remembering all the times that you pointed out
Say, the glass is clear but all this fear
Starts a-leaving a mark
Your idle hands are all that stands
From your time in the dark
But it’s still alright
— Nathaniel Rateliff

Wednesday Thoughts on a Thursday

May 7 2020

We are standing by the window that faces the street. The same street that used to have a lot of traffic back in the day, and cars that were constantly honking because it was going to slow. About as slow as we think it’s going inside now. There aren’t that many cars, or buses, that drive by now and even the sirens have stopped. Every now and then I lean my head too much towards the window and my forehead leave marks on the window, that window we cleaned not too long ago. Maybe that is why I constantly bump into it, it’s so clean that I can’t even see it’s there, or is it because I am so curious about what is going on further down the street? It’s Happy Hour and this is where we end up for that now, becuase there isn’t that much else to do. It’s even a sentence we found ourselves saying more than once, Do you want to come and stand by the window with me and see what’s going on out there? This is where we talk about the day that passed, what we accomplished, or didn’t accomplish, and what we read or listened to news wise. But even the news is something we turn off or scroll past if it sounds or looks too heavy. Because who wants to listen to how this America is breaking down right in front of you.

The days go by, very slowly but still fast. It’s already May and we spent all of April in here, or not all but that is what it feels like. We live in an area that some people would describe as “a little rough around the edges” and the atmosphere feels different out there now. I feel the same way I did when we just moved here. I don’t really have anything to complain about, being inside, because I have a job that is willing to pay me working from home. It’s probably not the same for a large number of people around here. If you thought people were struggling before this, just imagine what they do now.

The other day I spent more than a hour searching for face masks. Not the one that contains cucumber and not the N95 either. Those masks are reserved for the people on the front line, and rightfully so. If you went on Amazon back in March all PPE including hand sanitizer and bleach were reserved for the front line. We had everything we needed back then, but now we need these face masks, the light version. The type of face mask that is sewn by workers who used to make bags or clothes or everything in between. It’s not meant to protect me from the virus, but it’s probably better than nothing as long as it doesn’t get wet. It’s meant to protect others from me if I would ever carry the virus without being sick. Just think about that, we now live in a world where I can say I spend an hour ordering face masks.

It’s Thursday, and on Thursdays people on the other side of the Atlantic (read Sweden) eat yellow pea soup, and so do we. With pancake. I’ve been thinking a lot about Swedes and Sweden lately. We went there last summer, the first summer in almost ten years and maybe that is why. I don’t really want to live in Sweden because this is where my home is now. But it’s the Swedish songs and artists that are constantly echoing in my head nowadays.